Lessons From “Never Been Kissed”

The most awkward movie ever…that gives you so much hope!

Girls are known for our love of the Romantic Comedy movie genre. We laugh, we cry, and we swoon over the leading man. I am no exception to this rule. Romantic comedies are the bane of my existence. They give me unrealistic ideas of love and provide me with hope that despite all my guy blunders, there’s a perfect guy for me…somewhere… Unfortunately, I haven’t found that somewhere quite yet.

“That thing, that moment, when you kiss someone and everything around becomes hazy and the only thing in focus is you and this person and you realize that that person is the only person that you’re supposed to kiss for the rest of your life, and for one moment you get this amazing gift and you want to laugh and you want to cry because you feel so lucky that you found it and so scared that that it will go away all at the same time.” – Josie Geller

For those of you who’ve never watched Never Been Kissed, here’s a quick brief. It’s the tale of a copy editor, Josie Geller,  who wants to be a hard journalist but she’s too awkward to be given a chance. By luck, she is given the opportunity to be an undercover reporter as a high school student. Unfortunately, she barely survived the bullying of high school and has no idea how to become part of the popular crowd and get a good story. Now to the juicy stuff…HER TEACHER IS HOT! Forget all the high school guys (who are clearly in the acting category of “older to play younger”)! This man is ON FIRE! I drool and fan myself every time he comes on screen. Anyway, her teacher starts to fall in love with her and Josie really likes him, but can’t reveal her true identity. When she blows her cover to save her nerd friend from humiliation, her teacher feels like he’s been lied to and gets all butt hurt. In the end, Josie writes an article professing her love for him and sharing her humiliating past – including the fact that she’s “never been kissed”. She requests that if he loves her, he will meet her at the championship baseball game and give her a real kiss. Long story short, they end up kissing and live happily ever after.

Here’s what I learned from this movie…

  1. Teachers are never this hot. Even if you do stumble across a unicorn teacher, there are real life consequences for getting with them – especially if you are in high school. I had a teacher who all the boys were in love with. She was flirty and attentive to them, but to my knowledge she never acted on it. She ended up having an affair with the IT guy and got fired. Lesson: Just don’t get with the teacher…chances are they’re just a sleaze ball.

    If he was my teacher…I would have gone to class more.
  2. Be who you are…but also learn to filter. This movie is painfully uncomfortable to watch at times because Josie is incredibly awkward. She professes her love for her high school crush through a Shakespeare poem and ends up getting egged before prom. Lesson: It’s totally okay to be yourself and nerd out (I do it all the time), but you also need to use your common sense and filter before you speak.
  3. Stop living in your glory days and definitely don’t go back to high school to relive them. Josie’s older brother goes back to school so that he can try to get a baseball scholarship, but he’s 23 years old and it’s just plain creepy. A 16-year old wants to lose her virginity to him because she thinks he’s in high school and not until the end of the movie does he get a conscience and stop leading her on. Gross! Lesson: Grow up…it’s not worth getting arrested for statutory rape.
  4. It is unrealistic to think that putting out a PSA about your love life will win you the man of your dreams. Case and point…me putting my life out there in this blog. I don’t see any men lining up after reading any of this. Josie’s just damn lucky that her teacher bothered to read the paper that day. Lesson: Professing your undying love in private where less people are watching to avoid possible public humiliation.

Now that you’ve learned some great lessons about love, go grab your glass of wine and get back to watching the show. Cheers to Surviving Single!


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